She is in my trunk
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
i now understand why vodka
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
