well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
