Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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