tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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