O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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