i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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