i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
