i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
