If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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