Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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