the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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