After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
love makes seman taste better
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Randomize
