you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
