why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
