i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
The uberlube is also flammable
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
