what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
