Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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