i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
