I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
