wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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