i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
