i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
