Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
