Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
