Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just had sex on a roof
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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