I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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