oh god the rape fog is back!
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
