so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I'm passing your future prison.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
