omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
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