We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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