Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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