Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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