I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize