Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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