her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I love you.
Bad choice
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
