i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
