I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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