i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
