I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
