I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
