Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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