I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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