no. you can't hotbox the world.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
