they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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