On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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