That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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