erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
