The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I could make wine with my vomit
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
