Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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