i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
